Recipes I: Fig Glazed Roast With Rosemary and Pine Nuts

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Dear Patrons,

Here's something new for Thanksgiving. A new series addendum I call "Recipes". These are entries into the great living book known as the Arcanum Gastronomica. In spirit of that great and ever-evolving ancient tome, from time to time, I may revisit and enhance and make additional artwork or entries to these recipes in particular to the different stages. Enjoy the company of friends, family and especially the deliciously beautiful. Bon appétit!

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I. A DISCOVERY AT THE ISLAND (1 full color artwork + 1 alternate version)

Notes recovered from the secret room of the Financier's Island dated 2011, once in the custody of FBI, current location unknown. Author unknown.

The preparation is a culmination of centuries of collected knowledge of the society. No twine or rope is used, it is entirely an exercise of balance, planning and composition. Vanessa was one of [redacted]'s favorites and he was sad to see her sacrifice for the Fourth Thursday but her most recent attempt to escape proved to be an act of recalcitrance for which there could be no redemption. The Man in the Bull Mask demanded a sacrifice and she would be the one. [Redacted] had personally requested me to prepare her for a private dinner party with a handful of his close associates in the presence of the Man in the Bull Mask, using the best of my expertise and using methods of which requires nothing less of perfection this evening and this is undeniably one of my most ambitious projects to date.

Thus, I am making documentation in the form of both a journal and a recipe subject to approval into the Arcanum Gastronomica with my personal hand-written notes in red as optional how the Archivist sees fit.


Ingredients prepared:

  • 1 hairless doe, whole
  • 9 cups of melted breast butter
  • olive oil
  • whole peeled onions
  • spice blend (sage, dried figs, sea salt, black pepper, rosemary)
  • 5 cups of bone broth (preferably human and harvested from past subjects)
  • mustard
  • spray bottle mix (melted breast butter, apple cider vinegar, crushed figs, brown sugar)
  • garlic cloves
  • salt
  • pepper
  • chives
  • lemon
  • garnish (pine nuts, halved fresh figs, orange slices, sprigs of rosemary)

Additional materials used:

  • cheesecloth
  • syringe
  • baster

First, the head and organ sac were removed from the subject and saved for another use. The body had been depilated and kept whole while the cavity was cleaned thoroughly under running water and then patted dry. Since the Circle Elite had fostered an attitude of honesty, I do not feel ashamed to admit that this moment alone with Vanessa from the slaughter to preparation had been some of the most memorable times I had being part of the Circle. Meanwhile, a folded cheesecloth was soaked in 6 cups of melted breast butter until the entire cloth is saturated.

Whole peeled onions were placed in the neck cavity until stuffed. Then, the entire body (inside and out) was then seasoned with 1 cup of the spice blend. How I performed this was to first moisten my hands with olive oil and then rub the seasoning all over the carcass. Particular attention was paid to the delicate regions such as nipples, perineum, fingers and toes to prevent scorching. The upper and lower extremities were then attached together using a method I had perfected called the "twineless truss" using an adhesive resinous sugar glaze with a fig accent. The properties of this mixture have been added into a previous entry of the Arcanum Gastronomica (see page 1107 for details).

The soaked cheesecloth is placed on the roasting rack consisting of a large, shallow roasting pan. The body was then placed on the cheesecloth, breast-side down. I used a specially designed indented rack to prevent extreme deformity of Vanessa's breasts where in our case she was particularly well-endowed. Then, the cheesecloth is tucked in around the sides of the girl.

The roasting pan was then placed into a cold oven which was then set to 375 degrees in temperature. After 80 minutes, the skin was basted with leftover melted breast butter. This was repeated again after another 60 minutes.

I'd let the carcass sit for a further 60 minutes when the roasting pan was removed from the oven and the temperature reduced to 325 degrees. Carefully, the body was flipped over in the pan so that the breasts are now facing up. If the bosom is compressed which were slightly so with Vanessa, use the syringe to pump more butter into the breasts and massage them into shape. I had also used the opportunity to observe the integrity of the 'twineless truss'. Add more adhesive glazed resin if needed. The cheesecloth was re-laid over the body and then basted with 3 cups of bone broth. The girl was placed back in the oven. Every 45 minutes or so the girl would be basted with broth (or if the juices thicken too much in the pan). This was continued until the carcass reaches 175 degrees in the thickest part of the breast, about 5 1/2 hours depending on the size of the subject. If too much liquid accumulates in the pan, use a baster to remove the excess and saved for re-basting; do not let the girl “swim” in liquid in the pan.

Then, the girl was removed from the oven and the temperature was increased to 500 degrees. The cheesecloth had been carefully removed to avoid sticking and paint the skin lightly with mustard. The trotters had also been painted with more adhesive glazed resin. She was seasoned with an additional 8 tablespoons of spice blend and then placed back in the oven.

All remaining cup melted breast butter was combined with the apple cider vinegar/crushed fig/brown sugar mix in a spray bottle. The girl was then removed from the oven every 15 minutes during this period and sprayed with the butter mixture. Roasting and spraying continued until a thermometer which would be inserted in the thickest part of the thigh reached an internal temperature of 175 degrees. Then the girl was removed from the oven and given one final spray.

She'd been set aside for 30 minutes before slicing. Meanwhile, serving platters had been prepared by first, rubbing the garlic cloves over platter, releasing the oils and sprinkling over a little salt and pepper, and then a little warm breast butter and olive oil mix had been drizzled and sprinkle over chopped chives and lemon zest. Finally, the girl was placed on the prepared platter, garnished with pine nuts, fresh orange slices, halved figs, rosemary sprigs, and then served.

For the Fourth Thursday Feast, we had served the main course with the girl's head and following side dishes:

  • Crispy Mushroom Dressing with Apple and Sage
  • Roasted Garlic Smashed Potatoes with Parsnips and Charred Radicchio
  • Cranberry Sauce with Apple flavors

Additional notes:

All in all, Vanessa's preparation needed to begin around 9am in time to be served by evening's dinner which had been 7:00pm in our case. Depending on how the girl is served, breast-up or breast-down, I would have the butcher crack the back and make incisions in the ribs at the underbust or at both sides of the spine before roasting as we had served Vanessa breast up, the incisions were made between her spine. This is done to enhance flavor. It is also preferable to keep the incisions out of sight during serving so plan the presentation before making. The spice blend that was used with Vanessa had also been used for the crispy mushroom dressing.

The reception for this dish had been highly favorable. The diners had been particularly enamored by the "twineless truss" technique of which I pioneered along with the shape of the feet which I'd managed to shape into a desirable pointed pose. This technique, called "socking" of which I cannot take full credit, although I had adapted and modified the method from the notes from "The Gentleman" for his slender harvests. I am honored to be part of of previous luminaries and predecessors of whom had been integral in my culinary education through the Arcanum Gastronomica. [Redacted] had confided in me weeks later that he still misses Vanessa not only for her beauty but her talent and personality. I can concur that he had not been the same man ever since, with fewer inhibitions and a disposition leaning to cruelty and more wary of being too attached to his girls.


II. (BONUS) WORKS IN PROGRESS OF THE FIG GLAZED ROAST (2 works in progress of the same scene)

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